A lovenote

You lie suspended between the worlds of "if" and "are". A polarity between perhaps and definite tangibility. And there you sweetly rest until all the shortcomings of this physical world, of my own mortal incapabilities and every reason you cannot be here now will part ways to allow your miraculous entrance into our lives.

I will never be ready for everything you will bring with you, and at this moment I have never been more ready for you. Perhaps as time elaspes it will bring with it enough grace to further fortify my strength for you. What I do know is that surely you are coming, for how else can it be that my heart misses you with such a deep love and breathlessness, though I have never held you in this lifetime? It is as though your first lesson to your parents might be that of patience. I must believe we'll get you here in time, however long it might take. We're ready whenever you are, too. There is so much for you to see.

April 11

On the eve of our nephew born I imagine you might be scared,

thrilled,

perspiring,

anxious. 

Ready. 

Am I right? Are you any of these?

Exuding creativity in its ultimate form, your body made a child. 

And soon I can imagine holding him, bundled.

Skin soft and hair like one thousand pieces of thread

meticulously aligned against the sweetest, smallest scalp

as the tender weight of everything that makes a human is easily held in the arms of another. 

Welcome to our world, Cannon James. May you think, be loved, find peace, and astound us. My hope is for all of this and more to be yours, and perhaps in the most surprising of ways, too, should you find some luck at the turns. 

As the day awakens

What of the disappointments from this life do we reap?

May they not bring to us only sorrow (but certainly that in order to later be enamoured by joy) but also a remembrance of themselves we might carry with us. And not to dismay, but to remember. Perhaps reminders close to our hearts, maybe a string around our finger to convey of us the inevitable human fallibility but moreso, resilience. These are things unseen that we carry with us.

We carry with us these invisible tokens of our journey and choose to share at our discretion. Reminders, memories of loved ones lost, of failed attempts, of disappointments encountered. My prayer is they augment us to a deeper character. May we not become brittle and stone-faced in their wake. 

And furthermore, may our unseen joys be equally as wrapped around us. At the end of our journey through life, may the rich imbalance of love and peace against strife exist.